NOTE FROM THE EDITOR
Scoots here,
As I’m sure you’ve already heard, Cramden Cooper’s attempts to have me criminally charged for perjury have gone absolutely nowhere. All I have to say is–if he didn’t want his dirty laundry aired, he should have reduced the number of felonies that he was willing to commit. Let’s hope that he finally learns something constructive.
I appreciate all the support that you have provided to me during these trying times. Obviously, you are familiar with my work and know that his claims were ludicrous from the start.
Afterall…
As a professional journalist, there are very few constitutional boundaries on my speech, and I’m well within my rights to publish a newspaper article, or two, shining a light on the seedier side of Mr. Cooper’s used car operation, or the fact that he’s THE LEADING SUSPECT in the unsolved murder of Frank Baumgarten, retired policeman, and former night watchman in the Museum of Natural History. Coincidently, Mr. Cooper’s girlfriend was an intern at the Museum during that time, which makes them both prime suspects (For a refresher, read the award-winning newspaper articles I wrote at the time)!
At any rate, my attorney tells me that I’m well within my rights to compile everything I know about Mr. Cooper and to publish it in a series of books, if that’s what it takes to warn the World about his insidious past.
And make no doubt about it, I consider it my duty to protect innocent women and children from his uncanny ability to rob everyone blind and somehow slink away without so much as a reflex from the retributive muscles of the universe, which so regularly punishes the rest of us for the errors in our ways.
In short, my speech is protected, not to mention, sacrosanct to the functioning of a healthy democracy. I get to push my constitutional freedoms right up into the man’s nose and count his nostril hairs, and there isn’t one damn thing he can do about it.